You haven't seen me in awhile because I'm too old for your threadbare clothes.
And your uncomfortable platform shoes.
And your owl pendants.
And your bad 90s revival ensembles I rocked the first time 'round.
You get the gist.
Just to really put the nail in my UO coffin, on my last trip there (strictly to purchase a super hipster coffee table book), I heard the following dialog:
Girl 1 (we'll call her Britney): "I was totally going to take Brandon to the grab-a-date, but he lost his fake."
Girl 2 (we'll call her Mandy): "Is he Pike or a Sigma Chi?"
BUH-BYE!
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