Things That Make Me Go, Huhwah?

1) Eddie Murphy will be hosting this year's Oscars. I predict this will not end well for Norbit. Even if he makes himself the butt of the joke (which I suspect he will do a lot of), I fear that we'll be missing Anne & James about 2 dance numbers in.

At least last year's failblog.com twosome have done more/better work recently, so we can all just politely look past the travesty that was their hosting gig. Eddie has done 0.0 worth noting in the last 15 years. This may be the final nail in the proverbial shark-jumping coffin.

2) Ali "Aliana" Lohan's new face.

Dear "Aliana",
Your rep claims this drastic shift in appearance is a "natural growth spurt". Um, I don't know what growth spurts look like in LA, but in the Midwest, the term for what's happening here is "eating disorder". Also, unless your goal was to fill the recently coined "transgender chic" category, you look way better pre-"spurt".

3) George Clooney + Dancing with the Stars = Pool-o-Girlfriends.

This is just embarrasing. I can't help but take George's taste in a women a little bit personally as he's from my home town. REPRESENT GEORGE. Stacy is cute 'n all, but really?

She thinks she's going to be different. OF COURSE YOU ARE STACY. You seem super sharp. #clichefail

His most recent cast-off is now filling Stacy's old sequined pumps on this season's Dancing with the "Stars". I could comment on her being famous for 0.0, but I just said she's on Dancing with the Stars so that would be redundant.

Until next time.